February 2012 ~ Education for All

Goal of Every Civil Society - Education For All

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Education for Sustainable Development for Child Education and Schools

Apart from the ease of online Florida auto insurance quotes, you'll also receive lower rates than if you buy elsewhere. Why this is the case is beyond the scope of this article.

Who Needs Help With Children?

"I do, I do!"

So much for the play on words based on the 1980's Trident Sugarless "Who Wants Gum" commercial. The Canadian version added the following line:

"Me too, please!"

My translation: Not only do I need help with children, but as an American immigrant living in Canada, I apparently need help with manners, too.:)

But seriously folks...

Last week I started a series on improving relationships with our children by learning how to communicate better. In an attempt to understand and/or justify my own position, I wrote out several possible reasons (OK, excuses) why I work so well with other people's kids, but sorely lack the necessary skills to succeed with my own step-daughters at home.

After another week of pondering, reading and researching on the subject, I have to tell you that I feel so much better now. You see, we ALL need help with children from time to time. I learned that even the best parents in the world 'lose it' every now and then.

Hopefully, that little tidbit of information will make you feel much better, too! After all, that's what this article is all about.

(you're welcome)

Above and Beyond Help With Children

The primary focus of this series is to offer you help with children in the form of better communication skills with proven results. You'll find, as an additional bonus, that reading and applying these words of wisdom will help you in just about ANY relationship. (I just love unadvertised bonuses, don't you?)

Before we get into the actual skill sets, we're going to take a look at two huge potential road blocks to improving your relationships. By being aware of and understanding these possible traps, you'll greatly accelerate and augment the benefits of any help with children advice you acquire.

When It Comes to Getting Help With Children, It's Impossible to Judge Not

I don't care what you call it - evaluating, comparing, contrasting - they are all forms of judgment. Human beings operate on a moment-to-moment basis by making continuous choices non-stop, all day long. In order to choose, we must be able to evaluate, compare, contrast and yes, judge. In that sense, humans simply cannot 'judge not'.

How does this apply to help with children? Just about everything. For instance, comparing children is something we know we shouldn't do, yet many - if not most - of us do this instinctually. Even if we don't compare our children to other kids, we may have a set standard - an expectation - in our mind. This becomes our point of comparison, one that more often than not leaves us utterly disappointed and totally frustrated.

As crazy as this seems, we also can have directly conflicting expectations. As an example, I would like my girls to obey my every command immediately and without question. (Talk about setting yourself up for utter disappointment and total frustration) However, I also want my girls to be strong and independent with minds of their own, taking @#$% from nobody! (With such conflicting ideals, can you see why I desperately need help with children?)

Is there a way out of this 'judge not' conundrum? Of course, there's a solution for every problem. These seven simple suggestions will definitely help with children.

Know what you want. We all want 'more' and 'better' but have we precisely defined this for ourselves? Does 'better behavior' mean saying please and thank you? Does it mean play quietly?
Notify your children. Kids are natural pleasers... most of the time. But they have to know what you like first. Too often, parents tell their kids about all the things they DON'T want because... well, go back to #1.
Reward good behavior. You know the old saying, "Behavior that gets rewarded, gets reinforced." That means that if negative behavior is the only thing getting rewarded with your attention, guess what's getting reinforced?
Allow them to do it their way. Know what you want, and notify your kids... then back off! Let your children surprise you and deliver what you want in their own way.
Help them be 'right'. We all get off track. In fact, we're off course most of the time, what with constant changes and distractions. Your kids are no different. Help them be right by using face-saving tactics such as, "Were you trying to fool me?" Said in a playful way, kids will suddenly 'remember' what they were supposed to do. By keeping the atmosphere light and happy, they will be more willing and able to give you what you want in the long run.
Be consistent. There is nothing more confusing to a child than a bar that's constantly being raised without them knowing about it and having a chance to adjust to it.
Be realistic. A four-year-old won't do all the dishes, wash and iron the laundry, whip up fabulous meals, keep everyone in the house entertained, and show a surplus in the family budget every month. Neither will a teen. Heck, neither will most of us adults! Yes, set high standards, but don't expect the impossible. That way, no one gets hurt.

I Can't Get No Satisfaction

The second huge road block to building better relationships is that humans are naturally expansive. We all want to continue to grow. As such, we never get 'there' because when we arrive, we realize there's still 'more' and 'better' to be had... and we want that.

This is why parents constantly raise the bar without keeping their kids informed, making this perhaps the biggest area where parents need help with children. I see this in my private music practice all the time. I've even written about it on several occasions. In an effort to encourage their kids to improve, parents keep increasing the standard until the children conclude (quite correctly) that they will NEVER be good enough.

Even if the child gets 100% on a paper, the parent then expects (unrealistically) that the child should get 100% on ALL papers in every subject.

If the child keeps his room clean, he is expected to keep all other areas of the house clean, too.

If the child excels at music, she is expected to be the star of her sports team as well.

Here's another insane conflict - after all this "You're NEVER good enough" programing, parents expect their children to be grateful and appreciative for all the parents do for them!

The parents' main fear (and I've noticed this in myself, which is why I need help with children) is that the moment they reduce or eliminate the demand for the child to be all that s/he can be, there is a tendency in the child to slack off... to take the path of least resistance. God forbid, our kids become like US!

STOP THE INSANITY

OK, you'll have to forgive the old TV clichés and references ranging from Trident Gum to Susan Powter. See, I told you we all spend most of our time off course!:)

Back on track: Once again, when it comes to getting help with children, the solution lies in the seven points recapped below. In addition, you'll need to apply a healthy dose of the Universal Law, 'Give and You Shall Receive'. For example, if you want that grateful and appreciative attitude from your kids, you'll have to GIVE it to them first!

I know the argument; I use it myself all the time. "I can't give what I don't have."

Bull Ticky!

FIND something... CREATE something in your kids for which to be grateful and appreciative. Then GIVE IT AWAY as much and as fast as you can. Give always comes BEFORE receive. ALWAYS! (Sorry, I didn't make up the Law. That's just the way it works. Oh, I apologize for shouting, too. It's just that I really need to hear this myself!)

These seven points will get you past the hurdles and road blocks of 'judgment' and 'NEVER good enough'.

Know what you want.
Notify your children.
Reward good behavior.
Allow them to do it their way.
Help them be 'right'.
Be consistent.
Be realistic.

Now that we're off the runway, all the skills and techniques you read about to help with children will be of much greater value and benefit. You gotta Love That Feeling!

Computer Based Training Is The Future Of Education For All

Apart from the ease of online Florida auto insurance quotes, you'll also receive lower rates than if you buy elsewhere. Why this is the case is beyond the scope of this article.

How to Change Our Schools So That All Children Succeed - Part 1

It is the hope of all parents that their child is capable of keeping up with their peers academically. Delays in learning to read and write are the most common reasons given for retaining children. Children who do not experience early success in school, often experience little to no success throughout their academic years. The longer children experience failure, the greater the risk of them becoming withdrawn, disruptive and eventually dropping out of school all together.

Children who are not exposed to reading, writing, story telling and pencil and paper activities before entering school are often the ones who will be placed early in special education classes. Sadly, they will remain in these class until they exit school, often with a diploma that simply says they attended school. These are the children we need to reach in regular education, before they are placed in special education. These are the at-risk kids. They will continue to struggle with their academics throughout their schooling life if something isn't done before hand.

I have volunteered and worked in many different schools throughout this country. Both before becoming a Special Educator and since. I have seen the tragedy of these at-risk kids. There have been moments when some teachers have tried to help and other teachers have ignored the child because of behavior or simply not understanding how to help.

Over the years, there have been many programs implemented by both local and federal government funding. Some of these programs have worked extremely well, but they have no follow up. Most of them only reach a small percentage of these at-risk kids. We need more. We need schools that educate children, all children.

In today's world, our children need to come out of school with knowledge, skills, social awareness, and self-esteem. They need to feel confident about their future. Many jobs today require that you have more then a high school diploma. Information, management and technology (computers) jobs dominate the working world. There are fewer and fewer unskilled labor, factory, and craft jobs in the United States. Children need to be prepared to leave high school and either go to a technical school, junior college, university, or the military to be better prepared for the job market.

Our elementary schools need to change the way they work with at-risk kids. All children leaving elementary school should be well prepared for middle school and beyond. We need to rethink the way we plan the school day, the curriculum used, and how the monies and resources are allocated. Teachers and principals of elementary schools need to form a bond on how they are better prepared to deal with the issues of all the children they teach. At-risk kids should always be a part of the regular classroom, not self-contained. Small class groups, peer teaching, co-teaching, parent participation, a strong volunteer staff and lots of time for reading are just some of the ways we can make a difference.

Learning to read and write are essential to success in our world. Everything we do requires us to read, write and often do some type of calculations. How many people know how to write a resume, or a letter seeking a job? How many people can not read the newspaper? What about applications for a credit card, a bank account, a mortgage? When you go to the hospital you often have to sign a form stating your responsibility, can you read it? I can not tell you how many middle and high school students I have worked with (that were not special needs), who don't have a clue on how to do a check book, fill out an application, or even read instructions on almost anything. Whether they weren't paying attention when these subjects were taught, I don't know. I do know that they are missing parts of the educational process.

No Child Left Behind is promising to change the way we educate, but, I feel that they will still be missing the at-risk kids. Parents, teachers, and business people need to be more involved in what is happening in our schools. Our children are our biggest resource, let's all pitch in and make sure that they are successful.

College Education For Single Moms

Apart from the ease of online Florida auto insurance quotes, you'll also receive lower rates than if you buy elsewhere. Why this is the case is beyond the scope of this article.

How to Change Our Schools So That All Children Succeed - Part 4 - What We Know About Reading-Writing

When I last taught middle school, I taught a resource class reading and writing. Our Special Education Department purchased a new reading program which had an internet component. I liked the program, because it was done in small steps, easy to read, had many extra components with it and used reading materials that most of the kids enjoyed. In this part of my article on How to Change Schools So That All Children Succeed, I'm going to focus on reading and writing.

Reading and writing are thinking. In the past reading and writing lessons focused more on developing the skills than on developing children's knowledge and thinking abilities. Today, we understand the importance of teaching our children to read and write with thought behind it. When I taught reading to my students, we took the time to ask questions of the material we read. We searched for more information on the topic. We thought about the characters and asked questions of what we thought they would do next in the story. We debated issues on the various things we read. When asked to write on a topic dealing with our reading, we would have in depth conversations before my students would write. Some would try and write whatever I said, while others tried to put it in their own words. It is important to give students plenty of opportunities to read and write. Teachers need to give lots of examples for their students to be successful. All teaching needs to emphasize thinking, not just remembering. Engaging your child in thoughtful conversations about what they are reading, is important in helping them to write with more thoughtfulness. Find out what reading program your school is using. Ask your child questions about the books they are reading. Visit your child's school and sit in the classroom during the reading and writing lessons.

Prior knowledge plays an important role in reading comprehension and writing. The most important thing in determining how much a child will comprehend in their reading and how well they will communicate in their writing on any given topic, is how much prior knowledge they have. Children with limited prior knowledge will have difficulty with what they read and write on any specific topic. Help expose your child to various types of information. Help build their prior knowledge so that they are comfortable with their reading and writing assignments. Reading alone can build help to build prior knowledge. Your child needs to read a variety of print in order to build prior knowledge.

Children benefit from demonstration and instruction. Some children need more high quality instruction to learn to read and write. Teachers should demonstrate how to answer questions asked. Where to find the answer. The teaching activities of modeling, explaining, and demonstrating are major elements in helping all children learn to read and write. These activities are usually accomplished when a teacher reads aloud to his/her students, gives them a list of how to write a paper and then demonstrates with an example. Discusses a book or article with students injecting how they felt about the book or article. Good teachers will use a lot of demonstration in their instructions of any subject. Find out how your child's teacher teaches. Visit the classroom during instructional time.

Fluency in reading and spelling words is essential to reading and writing. The reading program I taught had a component dealing with spelling words that came from what we were reading. This is an important part of any reading program. Many students stumble over words they are not familiar with. Some students will try and pronounce the word phonetically, while others will just take a guess. Decoding and spelling abilities increase in direct proportion to the amount of successful reading and writing children do. A good teacher will pronounce a word for a student if they struggle with the word. They will also add words that too many students struggle with in the reading to their spelling list. Word fluency activities in classrooms should include lots of writing and easy reading as well as word manipulation and sorting activities.

Children need enormous opportunities to read and write real things. Sadly, there are an enormous amount of children who are not exposed to reading and writing at home. These children have the most difficult time with reading and writing. Easy access to books, magazines, and other reading materials is an important factor is developing readers and writers. Classrooms, along with the school library, should have large quantities of reading materials available for all students to browse, borrow or read when they finish an assignment. Most reading material in the classroom should be easy. If a child cannot read the material he/she is less likely to try reading again. Easy reading material develops fluency and provides practice in using good reading strategies.

There is no one best way to teach children to read and write. Because reading and writing are complex and children and teachers are different, there is no one easy way to teach reading and writing to all students. Teachers need to approach reading and writing using various methods. First you have to make sure your students can decode the words they are trying to read. Then you have to provide many different varieties of reading materials. Tap into prior knowledge. And finally, give plenty of opportunities to practice.

It takes time to teach reading and for the child learn to read. When parents and teachers work together they can help children become readers and writers.

Continuing Education for Nurses

Apart from the ease of online Florida auto insurance quotes, you'll also receive lower rates than if you buy elsewhere. Why this is the case is beyond the scope of this article.

Education for All

Goal of Every Civil Society - Education For All

Education for Sustainable Development for Child Education and Schools

Who Needs Help With Children?

Computer Based Training Is The Future Of Education For All

How to Change Our Schools So That All Children Succeed - Part 1

College Education For Single Moms

How to Change Our Schools So That All Children Succeed - Part 4 - What We Know About Reading-Writing

Continuing Education for Nurses

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